.
Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
Invictus
Out of the night that covers me
Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.
In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.
Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds and shall find me unafraid.
It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the
scroll,
I am the master of my fate,
I am the captain of my soul.
"Invictus" by William Ernest Henley
Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.
In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.
Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds and shall find me unafraid.
It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the
scroll,
I am the master of my fate,
I am the captain of my soul.
"Invictus" by William Ernest Henley
Friday, July 22, 2011
The New Macho
While it is certainly a difficult task to try and reclaim the word 'macho' as anything other than the stereotypical violent and out of touch guy portrayed in much of the media, the articles make some good points. One thing that we notice in reading them is that many of the men we know, respect and love in the ManKind Project represent the idea of the "The New Macho" very well. We call these men New Warriors. So bravo, men, keep on evolving!
We are teaching Emotional Integrity and Radical Personal Responsibility. We are helping each other become more resilient, more awake and more inspired to follow our purpose and live our mission. Here are some characteristics that a member of the ManKind Project has put forward as part of the'New Macho' paradigm.
The New Macho
He cleans up after himself.
He cleans up the planet.
He is a role model for young men.
He is rigorously honest and fiercely optimistic.
He holds himself accountable.
He knows what he feels.
He knows how to cry and he lets it go.
He knows how to rage without hurting others.
He knows how to fear and how to keep moving.
He seeks self-mastery.
He's let go of childish shame.
He feels guilty when he's done something wrong.
He is kind to men, kind to women, kind to children.
He teaches others how to be kind.
He says he's sorry.
He stopped blaming women or his parents or men for his pain years ago.
He stopped letting his defenses ruin his relationships.
He stopped letting his penis run his life.
He has enough self respect to tell the truth.
He creates intimacy and trust with his actions.
He has men that he trusts and that he turns to for support.
He knows how to roll with it.
He knows how to make it happen.
He is disciplined when he needs to be.
He is flexible when he needs to be.
He knows how to listen from the core of his being.
He's not afraid to get dirty.
He's ready to confront his own limitations.
He has high expectations for himself and for those he connects with.
He looks for ways to serve others.
He knows he is an individual.
He knows that we are all one.
He knows he is an animal and a part of nature.
He knows his spirit and his connection to something greater.
He knows that the future generations are watching his actions.
He builds communities where people are respected and valued.
He takes responsibility for himself and is also willing to be his brother's keeper.
He knows his higher purpose.
He loves with fierceness.
He laughs with abandon, because he gets the joke.
This is the Mature Masculine - it is the redefinition of masculinity for the 21st century. By no means is this list complete. You are welcome to come and add your gifts to this community. - Boysen Hodgson
read more: http://mankindproject.org/#ixzz1SqTNkkhy
We are teaching Emotional Integrity and Radical Personal Responsibility. We are helping each other become more resilient, more awake and more inspired to follow our purpose and live our mission. Here are some characteristics that a member of the ManKind Project has put forward as part of the'New Macho' paradigm.
The New Macho
He cleans up after himself.
He cleans up the planet.
He is a role model for young men.
He is rigorously honest and fiercely optimistic.
He holds himself accountable.
He knows what he feels.
He knows how to cry and he lets it go.
He knows how to rage without hurting others.
He knows how to fear and how to keep moving.
He seeks self-mastery.
He's let go of childish shame.
He feels guilty when he's done something wrong.
He is kind to men, kind to women, kind to children.
He teaches others how to be kind.
He says he's sorry.
He stopped blaming women or his parents or men for his pain years ago.
He stopped letting his defenses ruin his relationships.
He stopped letting his penis run his life.
He has enough self respect to tell the truth.
He creates intimacy and trust with his actions.
He has men that he trusts and that he turns to for support.
He knows how to roll with it.
He knows how to make it happen.
He is disciplined when he needs to be.
He is flexible when he needs to be.
He knows how to listen from the core of his being.
He's not afraid to get dirty.
He's ready to confront his own limitations.
He has high expectations for himself and for those he connects with.
He looks for ways to serve others.
He knows he is an individual.
He knows that we are all one.
He knows he is an animal and a part of nature.
He knows his spirit and his connection to something greater.
He knows that the future generations are watching his actions.
He builds communities where people are respected and valued.
He takes responsibility for himself and is also willing to be his brother's keeper.
He knows his higher purpose.
He loves with fierceness.
He laughs with abandon, because he gets the joke.
This is the Mature Masculine - it is the redefinition of masculinity for the 21st century. By no means is this list complete. You are welcome to come and add your gifts to this community. - Boysen Hodgson
read more: http://mankindproject.org/#ixzz1SqTNkkhy
Sunday, July 17, 2011
Prejudices
An Introduction to Power, Privilege and Difference.
You are invited to take part in an evening of exploration into our conscious and unconscious attitudes, beliefs and actions and the impact that they may have, whether intended or not.
COMPLETE THE SENTENCE:
Wearing that kind of dress she was….
He’s as tight as a…
The trouble with gays is that they…
Black people tend to be…
They drink too much, those…
Children should be…
That Arab with a beard looks like a…
Women drivers are…
Were you surprised or even shocked at how easily the words came..?
Do you struggle in your relationships?
Do you find yourself thinking or muttering things that you would be embarrassed to say out loud ?
Do you want to liberate yourself from prejudice?
You are invited to take part in an evening of exploration into our conscious and unconscious attitudes, beliefs and actions and the impact that they may have, whether intended or not.
COMPLETE THE SENTENCE:
Wearing that kind of dress she was….
He’s as tight as a…
The trouble with gays is that they…
Black people tend to be…
They drink too much, those…
Children should be…
That Arab with a beard looks like a…
Women drivers are…
Were you surprised or even shocked at how easily the words came..?
Do you struggle in your relationships?
Do you find yourself thinking or muttering things that you would be embarrassed to say out loud ?
Do you want to liberate yourself from prejudice?
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
Nelson Mandela
"If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his
head. If you talk to him in his own language, that goes to his heart."
Nelson Mandela
head. If you talk to him in his own language, that goes to his heart."
Nelson Mandela
Sunday, July 10, 2011
The MKP Adventure
The ManKindProject
Empowering men to live their true potential
The Adventure (The New Warrior Training Adventure) is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to challenge your limitations, your wounding, and your impaired vision of your life as a man. It is a space to discover what it is that holds you back from being the man that you could feel truly proud of. It is an intense and carefully choreographed event designed to help you see how you hurt yourself and those you love, to face the pain you may experience for yourself or impose on others, and to learn the art of transforming it into personal responsibility – for this is the gateway to liberation from the past.
The great disappointment of modern masculinity is that there are so few mature, wise men to show us the way. Most men can admit they did not get enough fathering; many feel that they grew from boy to man without much guidance. The ManKind Project cannot replace these missing elders but it can empower men to father themselves and, in time, become themselves the elders and fathers of the future. Together, we can positively change the future for other boys and young men. Together, we can positively change the way girls and women are impacted by boys and men. Together, we can play our part in creating a future that we can feel proud of.
The Adventure is a modern male initiation and self-examination. We believe that this is crucial to the development of a healthy and mature male self, no matter how old a man is. It is the “hero’s journey” of classical literature and myth that has nearly disappeared in modern culture. We ask men to stop living vicariously through movies, television, addictions and distractions and step up into their own adventure – in real time and surrounded by other men.
“The only devils in the world are those running around in our own hearts. That is where the battle must be fought.” — Mahatma Ghandi
from the MKP-UK homepage.
Empowering men to live their true potential
The Adventure (The New Warrior Training Adventure) is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to challenge your limitations, your wounding, and your impaired vision of your life as a man. It is a space to discover what it is that holds you back from being the man that you could feel truly proud of. It is an intense and carefully choreographed event designed to help you see how you hurt yourself and those you love, to face the pain you may experience for yourself or impose on others, and to learn the art of transforming it into personal responsibility – for this is the gateway to liberation from the past.
The great disappointment of modern masculinity is that there are so few mature, wise men to show us the way. Most men can admit they did not get enough fathering; many feel that they grew from boy to man without much guidance. The ManKind Project cannot replace these missing elders but it can empower men to father themselves and, in time, become themselves the elders and fathers of the future. Together, we can positively change the future for other boys and young men. Together, we can positively change the way girls and women are impacted by boys and men. Together, we can play our part in creating a future that we can feel proud of.
The Adventure is a modern male initiation and self-examination. We believe that this is crucial to the development of a healthy and mature male self, no matter how old a man is. It is the “hero’s journey” of classical literature and myth that has nearly disappeared in modern culture. We ask men to stop living vicariously through movies, television, addictions and distractions and step up into their own adventure – in real time and surrounded by other men.
“The only devils in the world are those running around in our own hearts. That is where the battle must be fought.” — Mahatma Ghandi
from the MKP-UK homepage.
Sunday, July 3, 2011
Confronting whiteness
How should I live in this strange place? This deceptively poetic question
captures an existential journey on which a white South African philosopher
and colleague of mine, Samantha Vice, has recently embarked.
She thinks white South Africans should feel shame and regret for the past
and for the fact that their whiteness still benefits them unjustly. She is
grappling with what it means for her to be a white person in a country that
is still deeply racialised, deeply political and deeply unjust. Her
reflections drip with an intense honesty that is too rare in the South
African academy. Sadly, it is an honesty often culpably missing from the
lives of too many white South Africans.
You might never have heard of Vice, in part because she does not think that
whites should participate in the public political processes of this country.
She is therefore tentative about placing her work in the public space, but
has started a conversation within the academy, a space in which she feels
she has the skills to make a contribution and is less burdened by her
whiteness than she might be within the public political arena.
In a dramatic way, her reluctance to step into the public space is an active
silence that is part of her argument. But I also think our country has long
needed brilliant and honest academics, such as Vice, to place their ideas
within the public space where they could have the greatest reach. No topic
deserves such treatment more urgently than the permanent elephant in any
South African room -- race. So, allow me to rehearse Vice's reflections and
to engage them.
Vice argues that the moral selves of whites are deeply stained by the unjust
system from which they have benefited. Whiteness, for her, is implicated in
the injustices that the black majority continue to experience 17 years
later. Whites should feel shame and regret, and make amends for being unjust
beneficiaries of whiteness. They should also withdraw from the political
space and live "in humility and silence", embarking on personal journeys,
inwardly focused, aimed at repairing their damaged moral selves.
By "whiteness" Vice is referring to the fact that a white skin has resulted
in benefits for the person who is white. This just is a historical fact. The
entire system of anti-black racism and apartheid benefited those who were
white. Whiteness became the norm of society.
Being white in all sectors of society was as advantageous as being male or
being masculine in the corporate sector. It was the "norm" and anything that
deviated from the norm was non-white, a negative description capturing the
judgment that non-whites are defective. Being non-white is as defective as
being gay or bisexual in a world in which heterosexuality is the norm.
Vice acknowledges that many whites resent the fact that they did not choose
to be white or to benefit from being white. Indeed, some whites opposed
apartheid. But shame and regret are not moral emotions that you should feel
only when you did something wrong yourself.
You should also be ashamed of benefiting unjustly. Feeling shame as a white
person is a way of acknowledging that you have been living in a world filled
with an injustice rooted in your whiteness. Shame is an acknowledgement that
the world you live in is not as it should be -- just and nonracial. Regret,
too, is appropriate. Vice regrets her own whiteness, not because she chose
it (which she could not have) but because her whiteness is what keeps the
unjust system, in which blacks are still socially and economically worse off
than whites, going.
Whiteness is not a historical fact only living on in history textbooks. It
continues to benefit whites. Indeed, one of the most profound observations
Vice makes is precisely the fact that South African whites are so
unconsciously habituated into an uncritical white way of being that they
fail even to acknowledge how being white continues to represent massive
social capital.
Just as a sexist black man or a homophobic white woman might never
acknowledge how they benefit from patriarchy and hetero-normativity (after
all, we live in a liberal society now, don't we, in which men and women and
gay and straight people are equal), so many whites take little care to
acknowledge the benefits of whiteness. Some will have the audacity to
respond to this article by claiming, in fact, to be victims, to be the new
blacks of South Africa.
They will argue that "the system" has now changed, because St John's College
in Houghton has now had a black head prefect, and most new BMWs are bought
by black professionals, and victims of anti-white racism now exist. Yet the
brutal, cold facts about poverty, inequality and unemployment, when analysed
along racial lines, underscore Vice's more honest view that whiteness
continues to represent unjust benefiting in post-democratic South Africa.
Whiteness remains the norm. Whiteness remains hip. And that is why it is
praiseworthy that Vice feels shame and regret for her whiteness.
Vice's reflections should resonate with whites in general. But they will
not. Shame and regret are difficult emotions to own up to. It is easier to
focus attention on others, like pointing out how corrupt this "black
government" is or how difficult it was for Johan, the neighbour's son, to
get a job despite having an engineering degree. Confronting your own self,
and being ashamed of benefiting unjustly from your whiteness, is too painful
for many to manage.
Vice's only mistake is her decision to withdraw from the public political
sphere. It is not black South Africans' turn to be political. It is all
South Africans' duty to engage each other as equals both within the public
and private spheres. Whites need to engage their whiteness publicly.
I do not want to be shielded from whiteness. I want to be given the space to
rehearse my own full personhood as a black South African by engaging Vice
publicly; it is the only way healthy relationships between blacks and whites
can develop.
Vice should, instead, have given slightly different advice to whites. This
is what I say to whites: "You have an unqualified political and ethical
right to engage in the political and public spheres of (y)our country, but
be mindful of how your whiteness still benefits you and gives you unearned
privileges. Engage black South Africans with humility, and be mindful of not
reinforcing whiteness as normative, just as a loud, boisterous,
rugby-obsessive chief executive should take care of his unearned privileges
as an aggressive, masculine male in the boardroom."
The journey will be worth it. But it requires discomforting honesty. We owe
it to ourselves as a nation in the making.
Eusebius McKaiser is a political commentator and an associate at the Wits
Centre for Ethics
captures an existential journey on which a white South African philosopher
and colleague of mine, Samantha Vice, has recently embarked.
She thinks white South Africans should feel shame and regret for the past
and for the fact that their whiteness still benefits them unjustly. She is
grappling with what it means for her to be a white person in a country that
is still deeply racialised, deeply political and deeply unjust. Her
reflections drip with an intense honesty that is too rare in the South
African academy. Sadly, it is an honesty often culpably missing from the
lives of too many white South Africans.
You might never have heard of Vice, in part because she does not think that
whites should participate in the public political processes of this country.
She is therefore tentative about placing her work in the public space, but
has started a conversation within the academy, a space in which she feels
she has the skills to make a contribution and is less burdened by her
whiteness than she might be within the public political arena.
In a dramatic way, her reluctance to step into the public space is an active
silence that is part of her argument. But I also think our country has long
needed brilliant and honest academics, such as Vice, to place their ideas
within the public space where they could have the greatest reach. No topic
deserves such treatment more urgently than the permanent elephant in any
South African room -- race. So, allow me to rehearse Vice's reflections and
to engage them.
Vice argues that the moral selves of whites are deeply stained by the unjust
system from which they have benefited. Whiteness, for her, is implicated in
the injustices that the black majority continue to experience 17 years
later. Whites should feel shame and regret, and make amends for being unjust
beneficiaries of whiteness. They should also withdraw from the political
space and live "in humility and silence", embarking on personal journeys,
inwardly focused, aimed at repairing their damaged moral selves.
By "whiteness" Vice is referring to the fact that a white skin has resulted
in benefits for the person who is white. This just is a historical fact. The
entire system of anti-black racism and apartheid benefited those who were
white. Whiteness became the norm of society.
Being white in all sectors of society was as advantageous as being male or
being masculine in the corporate sector. It was the "norm" and anything that
deviated from the norm was non-white, a negative description capturing the
judgment that non-whites are defective. Being non-white is as defective as
being gay or bisexual in a world in which heterosexuality is the norm.
Vice acknowledges that many whites resent the fact that they did not choose
to be white or to benefit from being white. Indeed, some whites opposed
apartheid. But shame and regret are not moral emotions that you should feel
only when you did something wrong yourself.
You should also be ashamed of benefiting unjustly. Feeling shame as a white
person is a way of acknowledging that you have been living in a world filled
with an injustice rooted in your whiteness. Shame is an acknowledgement that
the world you live in is not as it should be -- just and nonracial. Regret,
too, is appropriate. Vice regrets her own whiteness, not because she chose
it (which she could not have) but because her whiteness is what keeps the
unjust system, in which blacks are still socially and economically worse off
than whites, going.
Whiteness is not a historical fact only living on in history textbooks. It
continues to benefit whites. Indeed, one of the most profound observations
Vice makes is precisely the fact that South African whites are so
unconsciously habituated into an uncritical white way of being that they
fail even to acknowledge how being white continues to represent massive
social capital.
Just as a sexist black man or a homophobic white woman might never
acknowledge how they benefit from patriarchy and hetero-normativity (after
all, we live in a liberal society now, don't we, in which men and women and
gay and straight people are equal), so many whites take little care to
acknowledge the benefits of whiteness. Some will have the audacity to
respond to this article by claiming, in fact, to be victims, to be the new
blacks of South Africa.
They will argue that "the system" has now changed, because St John's College
in Houghton has now had a black head prefect, and most new BMWs are bought
by black professionals, and victims of anti-white racism now exist. Yet the
brutal, cold facts about poverty, inequality and unemployment, when analysed
along racial lines, underscore Vice's more honest view that whiteness
continues to represent unjust benefiting in post-democratic South Africa.
Whiteness remains the norm. Whiteness remains hip. And that is why it is
praiseworthy that Vice feels shame and regret for her whiteness.
Vice's reflections should resonate with whites in general. But they will
not. Shame and regret are difficult emotions to own up to. It is easier to
focus attention on others, like pointing out how corrupt this "black
government" is or how difficult it was for Johan, the neighbour's son, to
get a job despite having an engineering degree. Confronting your own self,
and being ashamed of benefiting unjustly from your whiteness, is too painful
for many to manage.
Vice's only mistake is her decision to withdraw from the public political
sphere. It is not black South Africans' turn to be political. It is all
South Africans' duty to engage each other as equals both within the public
and private spheres. Whites need to engage their whiteness publicly.
I do not want to be shielded from whiteness. I want to be given the space to
rehearse my own full personhood as a black South African by engaging Vice
publicly; it is the only way healthy relationships between blacks and whites
can develop.
Vice should, instead, have given slightly different advice to whites. This
is what I say to whites: "You have an unqualified political and ethical
right to engage in the political and public spheres of (y)our country, but
be mindful of how your whiteness still benefits you and gives you unearned
privileges. Engage black South Africans with humility, and be mindful of not
reinforcing whiteness as normative, just as a loud, boisterous,
rugby-obsessive chief executive should take care of his unearned privileges
as an aggressive, masculine male in the boardroom."
The journey will be worth it. But it requires discomforting honesty. We owe
it to ourselves as a nation in the making.
Eusebius McKaiser is a political commentator and an associate at the Wits
Centre for Ethics
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